Wednesday, 11 February 2015

Sex and the single girl

Hey guys, hope your all having a super week. I just wanted to thank you all for your responses to my "sex blogging is it for me" post and as you can probably tell I have made my decision. I've just decided to allow myself the freedom to write about whatever takes my fancy. I really hope you like what I have coming.......Anyway on with todays post.

As a single girl in her 20s with a rather colossal sexual apatite I am at some what of a dilemma, I feel as though I should have to keep my sexual desires hidden from the world, not to act upon them and save myself if not for marriage but for "the right guy"

We have moved on in society that we readily accept that modern girls these days wont be saving themselves for marriage, in fact most people would find it quite odd if a girl was "saving herself" however in most cycles its still expected that woman would "save it" for someone special, someone they are in a monogamous relationship with. The notion that a woman is enjoying casual sex is still very much looked down upon and this woman is tarnished with the tart/slut/whore brush, and of course people always feel sorry for the woman who is "just having sex", determining that the only explanation is she is being used....tell me, why is it presumed that the women is used? why at the very least is it not a mutual using ? or maybe just possibly these two free and single people and just enjoying the freedom of sexual expression. Its an orgasm not marriage why does it all have to be so serious? Sex feels good so why is it so hard to believe that a normal healthy woman could just be  enjoying that? A woman enjoying casual sex always has to been explained away by her having low self esteem or no self respect, or some other psychological issue.....WHY? I believe the answer is that the people putting the casual sex loving woman down are only doing so to make themselves feel better, maybe perhaps they wish they could be that free? Either way just because you may not understand somebody else's life choices does not mean they are wrong.
My own mother said to me "its just not the done thing"....why not? who decided this? Nobody has the right to tell anyone what to do with their own body. As far as I'm concerned as long as its legal and nobody gets hurt do whatever the hell you want!

Anyway I seem to have gone off on a little rant there.

Back to my point......I've spent pretty much my whole sexual life battling with myself I have the good girl side and the horny sex manic side, I've always tried to stifle the sex manic side as this is not how good girls behave right....? you'll never get a man that way.....etc. and if I have slipped and allowed my sexual desire to take over I've always had the slight pangs of guilt and questioned myself.
Well, you know what I'm so done with that! I have been thinking a lot about this topic recently, I spent the whole of last year being a "good girl" following the rules of dating cause I kept being told from every angle its time I settled down as I'm "getting on a bit" I don't think mid 20s is getting on but I do live in a tiny little town where if at the very least your not a single mother by your early 20s that's very unusual! The idea of that being my life is the stuff that fills my nightmares....literally!

So I have decided just to listen to my inner self, drown out the noise of what everybody else thinks I "should" be doing right now, and just have fun living my life! and yes that includes having shock horror casual sex! if I find the man of my dreams along the way then fine, but if I don't then no biggy all I know is I'm gonna have a hell of a lot of fun in the mean time! this space the sexual bucket list post is coming very soon.....I've wasted too much time looking for "the one" its time to start ticking some stuff off that list instead!

Now don't get me wrong sleeping with a bunch of random dudes isn't for me, (if that's your style then more power to ya :) ) the main reason being I don't wanna just have a bunch of bad sex which unfortunately is quite likely lol! No, I plan on having a few good friends I can call upon to me explore and discover my new self.

Hugs & Kisses
    Katie J

Tuesday, 10 February 2015

Nominate Me

Ok so I know this blog has only properly been going for just over a month, it really is just a new born baby, and my YouTube channel is still in its infancy as well...... but if not now then when? and if not me then who? You've gotta be in it to win it right? So I thought I would throw my hat into the ring and see what comes of it. As far as I know, no plus size YouTuber has ever been nominated for this and I thought it was about time that changed considering how huge YouTube has become.
I wanna show the plus size community and the world that being fat AND sexy is something to be proud of and not shied away from or hidden in the shadows!
Your support would mean the world to me!
Here's how you can help make my dreams come true.

How To Nominate
  1. Go to
  2. In The Category of Best Entertainer:
  3. In The Category of Best Blogger: Katie J
  4. In the Category of Best New Blog:
  5. Tweet me, facebook me or email me and I will send you happy thoughts and big hugs!
Hugs & Kisses
    Katie J

Saturday, 7 February 2015

Sex it for me?

So those of you who follow me on twitter and YouTube will know I have recently launched a new series called Viva La Sex in which I will be giving advice and my opinion on different aspects of sex and dating. This is a subject I feel very passionate about and love talking about. I find all aspects of human sexuality extremely interesting. With saying that I would also like to incorporate this subject into this blog, I have written the odd single girl/ dating post but never anything about my own personal sexual experiences. This is something I have been thinking over for the past week or so now and I keep going back and forth. So I'm asking for your help!
Do I really want to invite the whole world into my bed?
If this was an anonymous blog the answer would be a definite yes! but as it isn't anyone I meet with a quick search on google would be able to read the intimate details of my sex life........Yes, I could set up a new blog and hide who I am but I feel that would be like starting from square one again and "hiding" is really not something that appeals to me. If I'm gonna do this I'm gonna do it as the real me, no hiding.
Now, I have never been one to not do something cause of a fear of what other people may think of me however this really is an extra big line to cross.
These are really my only two concerns;
What if I meet a potential boyfriend, they find my blog and decide I'm a whore? Is that really the type of guy I would want to be with?
What if I decide to get a "proper" job on day, would this put employers off?
I'm really asking for your opinion on this? Is this even something you would want to read? Should I take that leap?
Do you want to hear about the intimate details of a sexually adventurous girl in her mid 20s?

Please tweet me, email me or comment down below, I really wanna hear your opinion on this.

 Hugs & Kisses
    Katie J

Tuesday, 3 February 2015

Just Single or a Player....?

So recently I met a guy I had chatted to on and off for a few month for coffee and a chat.  I thought all was going well till after some time of talking the inevitable question of past relationships reared it ugly head and after revealing I in fact had no serious past to really speak of he called my a "player" I have to admit I was a little shocked by this as I had never considered myself one of those types. Yes I've never had a serious relationship and yes I would say I'm a multi dater, but a player..............really..........?? I brushed off his comment by simply explaining I'm just young and single, certainly not a player. When I got home though I still couldn't shake that player label swirling round in my head and this got me to thinking if you date a number of guys but have to date never settled down are we really "just single" or are we players......Is there a difference.

To me a player is someone who plays games hence "player". Someone who tricks people into giving them whatever it is they want be it a quick fuck, someone to booty call at 3am or expensive dinners in the best restaurants with no thought or feeling for the other person. A player uses people to their own ends.

I asked coffee and a chat guy in a later phone convocation why he thought this about me, he said he thinks I'm the kind of girl that likes to make lots of people want to have sex with them and I enjoy making people fall for me. Now firstly without trying to sound up my own arse I don't "try" and make lots of people want to have sex with me it kind of just happens, I have blonde hair, big boobs and stacks of confidence and for better or worse this draws in quite a lot of sexual attention wanted or not. Having said that though I have never intentionally tried to make someone I wasn't into fall for me. I'm a straight down the line kind of girl, cards on the table. Yes ok it has happened once or twice in the past that guys I haven't been romantically interested in have fallen for me but this was of their own free will, I never suggested I wanted anything more then we already had and as soon as I found out their feelings for me I put a stop to whatever shenanigans were going on.
Just like everybody else I have also been on the receiving end of unrequited feelings and its a son of a bitch! but I don't for one minute think these guys were players, that's just what happens sometimes in this messy thing called life.
However I have defiantly come into contact with my fair share of actual players and while now in my mid 20s I like to think I know better, I defiantly fell for more guys lines then I care to recall in my formative younger years.

Obviously as a single 20-something I do my fair share of dating.......ok maybe more then my fair share but that's what single people do right? I don't ever hide the fact that I date from guys and I don't make out I feel more then I do. I don't lead people up the garden path, as soon as I'm sure this is going nowhere I break out the " maybe we would be better off as friends" text, we all know what it means but it just softens the blow a little.
I could maybe be accused of not being totally straight about what it is I want but that's only because I'm not really sure myself what I want. I'm clinging hold of the hope that one day when whatever it is shows up I will just know, but until then I'm gonna go with the flow.

So, if we are calling dating the game then yes I am defiantly one of the players, however I don't think all single people should be tarnished with the same negative connotations that come with the player label just because we are enjoying the freedom of single life and refusing to settle for less then we know we deserve.

Please come and follow me on BlogLovin your support means everything!

 Hugs & Kisses
    Katie J

Monday, 2 February 2015

One Skirt Three Ways - Plus Size Fashion

Afternoons guys!
Ok ok I know I haven't posted in 2 whole weeks! major fail on my part there, I've been quite distracted by sexy boys, my bad!  but new year resolutions don't just happen without any bumps in the road right? So you forgive me yes? ok good :)

Right on with the Plus Size fashion post!
So I got this maxi skirt in the sales and I haven't worn a long skirt in about 10 years! So for myself and others like me who have been absent from the maxi skirt in quite sometime I wanted to try out a few different ideas, see if I could make it fit into a plethora of occasions. I believe I succeeded.
Now not all the items I'm wearing are new or still available however I will try and link to items as similar as possible to the ones I am wearing.

High Waisted

Firstly with this skirt being so super duper long I wanted to see if it would work high wasted with it still being long enough to hit the floor, as I personally cant stand long skirts that fall above the ankles having little legs this just does not suit me one bit! However as I'm only 5ft 4inch even wearing this skirt high up still left plenty of length. I just simply paired it with a plan white vest top, cropped black cardigan and thick elasticated belt.

Comfy & Casual

Now as much as I love fashion I also love being cosy and comfy so this time I just put the skirt with a lovely warm slightly over sized jumper. This particular jumper does have some sequin star detailing to add a little sparkle after all everything is better with a little sparkle right?  I folded the bottom of the jumper up slightly as I think this just gave a better shape to the whole thing.


Those of you who know me will know I love a "sexy" outfit. I like to make the most of what I deem to be some of my best assets. That being said I thought I would see if I could pull this maxi skirt off in a party night outfit. I think it makes a nice change from the usual leggings or jeans I predominantly wear when dancing the night away. The top I chose is one I got from quite some time ago, the bottom of the top is elasticated which allows the plentiful fabric to fall down is an extremely flattering style. I chose to have the top sit just above the skirt so it would fall down at hit just at the right place. This top has lovely beading detail to the bust area, I also paired this with a thick elastic waist belt as to show off my hour glass figure.

Please come and follow me on BlogLovin your support means everything!

Hugs & Kisses
    Katie J

Friday, 16 January 2015

Dinner and Moive Night OutFit - Plus Size Fashion

Afternoon my little jellybeans hope you all have that Friday feeling!
Today I'm bring you a little plus size outfit inspiration. I got this amazing new coat from Asos and wanted a chance to show it off and share it with all you lovely people. In with that I thought I would show one of the new sales dresses I got in my plus size January sales post.

ASOS CURVE Exclusive Fit & Flare Coat With Belted Waist

Now this is the first coat I have purchased in quite some years as I'm not a huge fan on them as I have found most coats don't really fit my shape that well and end up making me look like a big box.
I had heard good things about the Asos curve fit and flare coats and when I saw this little beauty in the sale I thought I would give it a go. I'm so glad I did, this coat fits me like a glove! I love the belted waist as this help to define my figure and gives me a lovely shape. My favourite part of the cost has to be the dipped hem at the back I think it just gives this cost a little something extra. The coat has a felted wool feel and is super warm an cosy. This cost is available in the colours wine and navy and started off at £70 and is not available here for £35.
(while looking up links I may have just ordered this in the wine colour as well....whoops!)

Black And White Monochrome Block Stripe Skater Dress

So you may have already seen this dress in the sales clothing haul video I did, lots of you asked if you could see the dresses on so when I decided to wear this new dress to meet my friends for dinner and a movie I though I would take the opportunity to show you how it actually looks on. I'm 5ft 4in so you have some prospective of how long the dress might be on you. I did originally order this in my usual size but it was a little big so I took it back and sized down and now the fit is perfect. I love the little cut down the cleavage as it shows enough to be a little sexy but not enough to be all in your face. I love that when I twirl in this dress is goes out a little, I always wanted dresses like that as a kid I think that was the effect Disney movies had on me. The fit is amazing it shows off all the right curves and hides the lumps and bumps. I am wearing it with a yours clothing think pink waterfall cardigan to add a touch of colour, unfortunately this cardigan is no longer available however they do have a very similar one in purple available here. This dress is available here for £35.

If you liked this type of post and would like to see more where I try on different outfits then please leave me a comment. Hope you all have a lovely weekend and I'll see you Monday.

Please come and follow me on BlogLovin your support means everything!

Hugs & Kisses
    Katie J

Thursday, 15 January 2015

5 Things You Can Get Away With On Your Period

Evening guys, so obviously Aunt flo is in town and making me feel like I have a rugby match going on in my womb, all I want to do is curl up into a ball and eat my weight in chocolate but in an attempt to make myself feel better I though I would bash this little blog post out.  So here you go: my top five things you can only get away with on your period;

1. Openly crying at the Meerkat advert.
I'm a pretty soft soul and it doesn't take much for something sentimental on the telly to make me cry, however I feel a 30sec advert about talking Meerkats is a little overboard unless that is I'm on my period then I am allowed to cry at anything. including the little snail I accidently stood on last night! RIP MR Slime

2. Eating everything in sight
This might possibly be my favourite one and its not like I exactly restrict myself that much normally anyway, but for some reason when the moon is right I just get ravenous! and I crave all the crappy things anything fatty and salty and especially CHOCOLATE the rest of the month I could take it or leave it but when I'm on its on! maybe its the endorphins I don't know but it just makes me feel so much better.

3. Taking an hour long bubble bath
I'm normally a shower person I just feel they are more time efficient but when I'm felling like poop the last thing I wanna do is stand there lathering up. No I use all my loveliest bath products pop on some Enya grab a trashy magazine and let my troubles drift away. I inevitably have the water far too hot so make that ooo ahahah sound when lowering myself in and come out looking like boiled lobster. I pretty much take over the bathroom for at least an hour and just keep topping up the hot water. This hour long using all the hot water bath taking doesn't make me popular in my house but I'm on my period so.......blah

4. Wearing cosy PJ's all day
In particular a onsie, which it what I have chosen to wear all day! Most of the time it would be see as a terrible notion to not get dressed for the day, but on your period its totally fine to just snuggle up in a big fuzzy ball and forget about the world...if only for one day.

5. Wearing massive pants
Now normally I am a fan of the sexy lace frenchies but not right now, no right now I want the biggest black pants I can get my hands on!  Its total comfort all the way, any hint of sexiness can go right out the window. Granny's totally have it right as far as this one is concerned....well for those few days a month anyway.

So yes I am that total girl on her period stereotype but you know i think im ok with that. If its gonna make me feel better then I'm gonna do it. Writing this post has at least made me feel better about almost wasting an entire day, and I hope it makes you guys feel a little better about your monthy behaviours. Love to hear about the things you do to make yourself feel better so leave me a comment :)

Please come and follow me on BlogLovin your support means everything!

Hugs & Kisses
    Katie J
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